How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop?

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 Site is being moved from IIS to Apache; As a result of this, I also get to have the fun and joy of changing from ASP to PHP. This creates a small problem. I don't know PHP. Yet. Until such time I'm semi-fluent in PHP, all the major scripts on my site [IE: Music] WILL NOT work. I apologize for any problems that may arise as a result.
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